CEDAR & RJ FIND WARM WELCOME
Cedar and RJ Jernigan found a community— people they call ‘family’—at the Y when they moved here from Arkansas in 2017.
“It has been a tremendous relief emotionally to move out here,” Cedar says. “Here we have emotional wealth and physical wealth. That wasn’t possible where we were.”
As a lesbian couple, Cedar and RJ endured dismissal, discrimination and harassment. The emotional labor took a toll on their physical and mental well-being. “We had to be somewhat closeted,” she says. “If we were authentic, we felt like gay activists.”
In 2013, they took action to help secure rights for other same-sex couples: they sued for the right to marry in Arkansas. They won, but they still felt uneasy in a place that would prefer they kept their sexual orientation to themselves.
When their adult son moved to Oregon, they decided to follow him. They sold everything they owned except for what would fit in one car. They purchased a home near the Y and the first thing Cedar did when she got to town was join the Y.
“We are not ‘othered’ here,” she says of the welcoming environment at the Y. “We are just another family.”
With the help of the Y’s financial assistance program, Cedar and RJ can afford to maintain a Y membership. They are so grateful for the assistance that they make a point to pay it back to the community in the form of volunteer hours at nonprofits such as Positive Community Kitchen, School Garden Project and Luvable Dog Rescue.
“We knew it would be good for our health and wellness,” she says. “We play tennis three times a week. We play pickleball. We lift weights.”
Cedar manages an autoimmune disorder called oral lichen planus, a chronic inflammatory condition that causes lesions in the mouth. “Without exercise and proper nutrition, it flairs up,” she laments. She keeps to a rigorous 7-daysa-week exercise plan, which also helps to prevent breast cancer recurrence. She is a 23-year survivor!
Beyond fitness activities, the Y makes them feel super connected.
“Several of the couples we play with, they’ve become like family. We’ve been through landmark moments with them: weddings or a death in their families.”
Most of their best friends are people they met at the Y.
Cedar sums up their feelings for the Y succinctly: “We love it here. It’s our nirvana.”
